


Hauntings of the Past

by CircuitryDemon



Category: HLVRAI - Fandom, Half-Life, Half-Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware
Genre: Cuddling, Little bit of hints of the possession au, M/M, Nightmares, Pining, Pre Relationship, please be gentle ive never written for these two before
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:53:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24745636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CircuitryDemon/pseuds/CircuitryDemon
Summary: The Resonance Cascade brought awful memories and horrid nightmares for everyone on the Science Team, what Gordon didn’t expect was the thought of that concept extending to Benrey.
Relationships: Benrey/Gordon Freeman
Comments: 4
Kudos: 281





	Hauntings of the Past

**Author's Note:**

> Not much to say other than this is a self indulgent cuddle fic, but Benrey’s speech being in all lowercase was completely intentional!

_ The heavy thrum of alien energy pounded in his head as he watched them run. Too much to handle properly, his body shifting and changing unnaturally as he watched with an almost helplessness as people he considered friends hopped from platform to platform, getting closer and closer to his hiding place.  _

**_Why you feeling bad, dude? This is an epic gamer moment, crushin them all under your sick boots._ **

_ His voice but not his words. The familiar sting behind his eyes burned as it felt like another being taking total control and he couldn't do anything about it when he watched as they entered the main chamber. He bit his lip so hard he bled, dark and thick running down his chin and dripping down into the deep red water below him.  _

**_It's go time._ **

_ Bullets flew and a sickly sour sweet voice littered the air as the battle grew, shouting and gunfire, escalating further and further until…  _

_ There was a sudden stop. A lull in the fighting and a hum that filled the air that sent a chill to his already ice cold body. _

_ Every skeleton that floated feet above the ground turned to face him directly, and when his eyes darted down he saw even his friends had their weapons pointed directly at him. Dozens of voices echoed across the chamber as a choir of sweet voices hit him at once, a light blue overtaking his vision as he felt himself be entrapped in a binding that couldn't be undone. Wrapping tighter and tighter, air escaping his tired lungs, couldn't think, couldn't yell, he was dieing- _

Benrey's eyes opened with a gasp, his whole body hitting the cushions as he awoke and fell a foot above the couch. He sat up and took him a moment, no longer was he in the breakroom of Black Mesa, but the home of a certain Gordon Freeman. Eyes lidded in exhaustion and trembling body drenched in sweat. He looked around the space, a small little living room and the blanket usually draped over him was across the room. He could see dark green orbs of sweet voice floating in the air, bouncing listlessly off the ceiling. 

Nope. Gotta get up. Gotta walk. Not thinking about it. No way. Fuck that noise.

Benrey almost bolted up off of the couch, taking a deep breath as he set out to wander the all too quiet house. A quick glance at the cable box showing it was almost three in the morning, but there was something he had to check.  _ Someone  _ he had to check.

  
  


_ "you sure you want me hangin around, feetman?"  _

_ "I dunno? Makes me kinda nervous to know you're just out and around with nowhere to go, might as well crash with me..."  _

_ "aw you care about me, feetman? i got all your pants in a twist?"  _

_ "Talk like that and I take the offer back, and stop calling me Feetman." _

Benrey knew after breaking Tommy out of prison and that major sick heist was finished he had nowhere to go. He thought at first to ask Tommy because it was the safest option, but when Gordon offered to let Benrey stay at his place, it had caught him so off guard but the excitement that bubbled under his skin was enough of an indicator he should take the offer. The memory came and went as he found himself in the doorway of Gordon's room. In the pitch black room Benry could see the lump under the sheets, a mess of dark and graying brown hair fluffed out behind it. He carefully walked forward, yeah standing over him was kind of creepy but he just had to make sure everyone was okay. He had already checked on Joshie- who he gave a little sweet voice to to make sure he slept through the night- and now found himself just staring down at the sleeping form of his other housemate. A small pink orb had slipped past his lips for a mere second before he put his hand on his mouth with an audible  _ slap.  _ He was fine, no need to get all weird and cringey worrying about feetman. It's chill, really, he should just head back to the couch and-

"Benrey…? It's the middle of the night, what are you doing up…?" Gordon's sleep riddled voice brought Benrey out of his trance, who watched as he turned and rubbed his eyes, blearily looking up at glowing yellow ones, able to see his face clearly and his body more of an ominous form in the darkness. "Is Joshua alright? Why are-" 

"joshie's fine." It came out too sharp, Benrey immediately clamping his mouth shut. "just uh… just came in here." 

"Just came in here?" 

"uh.. yea." 

The silence that fell over the two was deafening. 

"i mean, like, uh, y'know. just woke up." 

"Just woke up?"

"......mhm."

"...Bad dream?" 

Benrey scoffed, but he rubbed the back of his neck all the same, letting the quiet speak volumes before letting a mumbled out "...yea."

Gordon let out a sigh. He didn't think he'd be dealing with this stuff until Joshua was able to walk but…

"Come on, get in." Gordon huffed, scooting back a little and moving the blanket open. He watched Benrey balk for a moment, crossing his arms and huffing. But then after a moment, he sighed, leaning down and crawling under the sheets. He laid on his back, looking up at the ceiling with his arms behind his helmeted head. At first Gordon settled back into a comfortable position, glancing over and seeing Benrey just staring up at the ceiling, his usual calm expression held something.. something like fear. 

"What was it?" 

Benrey jumped a little, looking back over. Gordon was resting on the elbow of his bad his arm and looking right at him. He swallowed, sighing and shutting his eyes. 

"its nothing. just.. old stuff. all the black mesa stuff. its whatever. no big deal." 

Gordon frowned. Sure he gets the occasional nightmare, but it had never occurred to him that Benry would get them too. He's the one who attacked them all on Xen, it wouldn't make sense that-

"it was the same voice, my voice but not my words, y'know. like some dude grabbing hold of my brain meat and walking around like that rat movie. didn't wanna fight you guys, and then… just had no control. Tommy was nice to me about it all when I talked to him but then others I ain't so sure." 

Gordon frowned, Benrey had stopped looking at him, looking blankly up at the ceiling as he spoke. Gordon gently brought a hand over and touched his arm, noting how Benrey jumped under the touch. His eyes only moved to look at Gordon but then he turned completely, laying on his side, taking his left hand in his own, and just looking at it in an almost conflicted form. He wasn't expecting for Gordon to put his hand on him really. 

"You did… a lot of shit wrong. You got my hand cut off, you attacked all of us, but.." Gordon sighed. "You're trying, aren't you? To make shit better?" 

There was a long and heavy silence before Benrey nodded, eyes looking away from Gordon at this point with his shoulders hunched, but he didn't let go of his hand, in fact, his other hand came up and held it too, thumbs absentmindedly running along the smooth skin. 

"course im trying, uh, be stupid for me not to.." 

Gordon could practically feel the tremble in those thin hands. He sighed, murmuring out a "come here.." before he gently pulled Benrey to him, feeling Benrey go rigid in his arms. 

"I-Is this too much? I can-" 

Gordon tried to let go only to feel Benrey grab his tee shirt and pull him right back, resting his forehead on Gordon's chest. 

"nah, keep holdin' on… s'nice."

Gordon sighed softly, fixing his hold with his bad arm close to him, letting Benrey settle into his arms. He absentmindedly brought an arm up to pet his head- er, helmet. He never took it off, and to be honest Gordon wasn't even sure if the helmet  _ could _ come off. He'd watched this man put on shorts and a tee shirt and yet keep the helmet. It never even occurred to Gordon to even ask about it, it seemed almost  _ too _ personal, even considering what they were doing at that exact moment. Benrey was cold, too. Not like ice, but his skin felt the same chill as coming in from the outside. The thought to maybe give him one of his sweatshirts came to his mind. Maybe. Even that seemed so… domestic. But that's really what it was now, huh? No Black Mesa, no guns, no Xen, no military. Just a second chance and pleasant domesticity. He rested his chin on the top of Benrey's head, letting himself be used as a space heater for the other. Benrey was clinging so closely, it had to be because he was warm, right? He felt their legs twine together in the darkness of the room, so close he could feel the hairs on his legs and Benrey's hand on his back. The ex-guard still had his shirt clutched in his hand, a dusting of pink coming across Gordon's cheeks at the realization. If anything, this was kind of nice, he hadn't cuddled with anyone in so long and he almost sort of missed-

_ oooooooooo… _

Gordon blinked, seeing a few small orbs of sweet voice float up past his vision. It was like instead of snoring, a soft little chime came out with each exhale. Light blue that changed to a soft pink. He didn't know that one yet, even if he had been texting Tommy asking about the colors when it happened, but he smiled nonetheless. Carefully he pulled back, seeing Benrey’s eyes were shut, out cold. His expression softened, settling in and finding himself slipping back into slumber. 

When morning came, Benrey found himself alone. 

Eyes blinking out slumber as the bright light of the morning sun pooled into the open window of the bedroom. Raising his head from the pillow he had in his vice grip and brought a hand out of the blanket he was tangled up in, wiping drool off his mouth. Right, he  _ did _ get all cringe with his feelings last night and ran over to Feetman's room. The fact Gordon didn't kick him out when the guy woke up this morning was pretty nice though. He yawned, stretching out a little and hearing all the satisfying cracks that came with it, sitting up finally. In the broad daylight Benrey snorted, the room was sort of a mess; a few lone shirts around and some semblance of decor in the small bedroom. He looked up finally and paused. 

“Oh, look who decided to wake up.” Gordon’s voice rang out, in the doorway and leaning against one side of it. His hair was in that  cute  stupid ponytail and he was actually smiling, his arms crossed but in a casual manner. “Had to make sure Joshua slept well, ya know. You sleep good?” 

“oh i uh.. slept fine, dude.” Benrey murmured, sitting cross legged. 

He refused to acknowledge the nice warmth in his gut that bubbled up as Gordon smiled at him. 

“You hungry?” He finally asked. “ _ I made pancaaaakes…”  _

Benrey huffed at the little sing song tone. 

“your fail pancakes? i  _ guess _ , gimme a sec to like, wake up and shit..”

“Sounds like a plan, man.” Gordon had started to leave but paused when Benrey spoke up. 

“hey, uh, Gordon?” Oh, shit, first name. 

“Oh uh, yea? What’s up?”

“.....thanks. y’know. for last night.” 

Gordon’s expression softened, watching as Benrey seemed to be at almost an even worse loss for words than usual.

“You’re welcome to do it any time you want, man.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hope y’all enjoyed! HLVRAI has sunk its claws into me and i got a few one shot ideas i might write, both for frenrey and POSSIBLY some Boomer stuff too :P


End file.
